Monday, October 22, 2012

Revitalize your Marriage







Do you remember when you used to dream about how wonderful it would be to get married?
Of course, marriage is wonderful...but not all of the time. There will be times when marriage seems so easy, I mean everything is pink and you feel love is in the air, so natural...but there will also be times when marriage seem to be hard work. Marriage can have it's ups and downs and a successful mariage is only possible if both parties are prepared to work hard at it. 

Love must be nutured if they want to keep it from going stale.

Has your marriage gone stale? Have you stopped spending the time that is necessary to cultivate and nurture a relationship that is fulfilling? If this is the case - read on. Here are 8 tips that could help make your marriage go from boring to totally fascinating.

1. Forgive

Disagreements are only natural in any relationship. Wherever there are two people living in close proximity there are bound to be times when they disagree. Learning to forgive and not hold grudges is vital if they are to prevent bitterness from seeping in and souring things. People make mistakes and do wrong and even clumsy things. We need to be quick to say sorry, and quick to forgive. Married couples must never harbor grudges. Besides, harbouring grudges solves nothing. LEARN TO LET GO, YOUR SPOUSE IS ONLY A HUMAN!


John 20:23 ESV 

If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.”


2. Be respectful and honesty with one another

Don't take one another for granted. Learn to say thank you. Express your appreciation for the things your husband does for you. Tell the truth. If there is a problem talk about it, don't bottle it up. Couples who face their problems and talk things through are the ones that are most likely to build a strong, loving relationships.

Ephesians 5:33 ESV 

However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

3. Remember to laugh often

The daily grind of life can make everything seem like a chore. A married couple should take time to share jokes and other crazy antics to decrease tension. Remember, laughter is healing.


Proverbs 17:22 ESV 

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones

4. Communicate

It may seem obvious, but good communication is the key to a fulfilling marriage. Don't let things worsen. If there's anything making you feel upset or annoyed (maybe your husband did something even unpurpose) tell him right away, you shouldn't assume that he will guess what is wrong. What may be obvious to you, may not be obvious to him! Husbands too need to be more forthcoming in sharing what is on their minds. Good communication is vital. 


Proverbs 15:1 ESV

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

5. Decide together


It is important that couples make joint decisions on things like finances, children's education and upbringing, delegation of household chores, etc.  If you can't reach agreement straight away, leave it for a while and come back to it again later. Take turns in giving in to one another. Marriage isn't a competition.

1 Peter 3:1

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.

6. Don't forget the simple, small things

Husbands don't forget to compliment us. Don't forget to praise us for a job well done. Buy us flowers. Take us out for a romantic meal. Tell us how beautiful we are. Make us feel like we are your princesses. Wives,  be attentive to your husband's needs. Enjoy each other's company. Showing affection one for another is essential. 

1 Peter 3:7 

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

7. Stay in love

Nurture your love for one another. Enjoy every new discovery and every new day with your spouse. 

John 13:34 NIV

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 

8. Stay intimate

Intimacy is only able to grow in a marriage where there is a strong commitment to one another. Learn to be honest with one another about preferences. The sexual side of marriage must not vanish. Greater knowledge of your spouse and deeper affection, should make love making a celebration of your life together. Make time to be intimate. 


Hebrews 13:4 ESV 

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled...


Being married is not always easy. Especially in our society where so many marriages fail. But as long as both parties know that they have each other to hold on to, and most importantly God as their marriage foundation it should be a rewarding relationship. Be there for each other, “for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and til death do us part”.


30 comments:

  1. Angie,
    I like especially like Point #3 - Laugh often. Sometimes life gets so serious (or sometimes just plain dull), and laughing together IS good medicine. One month I found a plastic cockroach and put it on the soap in my husband's shower. After being scared by it, he hid it somewhere he knew it would scare me, and the fun continued all month long, with each of us never knowing where and when the cockroach was going to show up. It was a silly thing that made us laugh :) Blessings to you! Lori from Be Not Weary

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    1. lol! oh Lori, you really made me laugh! I can´t imagine you guys scaring each other with the plastic cockroach!! Hope my hubby doesn't start doing this! whenever I see a spider or cockroach I totally freak out!! but you guys really know how to have fun! may God continue blessing your marriage! Thanks for reading!

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  2. Great points -- marriage is often hard work, and the nitty gritty of life can get us down easily. But I love remembering those first dates, those first moments of longing after my husband. I am so in love with him after 4 children and 8 years of marriage and a move to Africa. Life brings challenges to bring us closer together. Laughing together is also key in my mind too , Lori. Life can definitely get too serious... we try and spend lots of time "teasing" one another and trying not to take each other too seriously. Blessings from Grace For That

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    1. wow you move to Africa?!! where exactly? I´m currently living in Botswana, but very soon we'll be moving to the UK. no...we're not missionaries hehe...it's because of my hubby's job :) thanks for reading!

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    2. Yes we moved to Madagascar this past January. We are missionaries with Mission Aviation Fellowship, my husband is an aircraft maintenance engineer.

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  3. These are all great tips...practical and doable for all of us. Thanks, Gail

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    1. Advice for all of us indeed, good to keep them in mind :) thanks for reading Gail!

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  4. Just stopping by from the Mama Moments link up to say hi. This is all really good advice. Marriage truly is the hardest thing I have ever done,followed closely by raising my son. I love the laugh often advice. I am a firm believer in the laugh or cry philosophy and laughing is so much nicer.

    www.adventureswithcaptaindestructo.com

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    1. Hi there, Melissa! totally agree on your last statement! as I'm also a true believer in the laugh or cry philosophy...I'll pay a visit to your site! remain blessed!

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  5. Excellent advice - especially the forgiveness part. So important and yet so easy to forget in the heat of the moment.

    Sarah @ A Cat-Like Cusiosity

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    1. true that Sarah, that is the area where The Lord has minitered to me the most in my marriage. thanks for reading, I´ll check out your site ;)

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  6. These are great guidelines, Angie. I am so thankful for women like you that challenge us in our marriages. I'm always up for a good challenge. :)

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    1. so kind of you Beth, thanks so much for visiting and your kind comment! keep blessed!

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  7. Great advice! I especially love your point about joint decisions.

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    1. Hi Rachel, great to have you around. Thanks for your comment! hope you´re having a great week so far! x

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  8. Love this list! Thanks for linking up!

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    1. Thanks for hosting Rachel. I love your blog and I'm inspired by your story. May The Lord continue blessing you and using you to touch lives :)

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  9. Very much needed to read this today, hug, and blessings to you.

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    1. Thanks so much Denise, humbled to hear you were blessed. all the glory goes to God. Thanks for visiting, remain blessed. Big hug to you too x

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  10. I certainly can take some of this advice and put it into practice. Thank you.

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    1. Thank YOU for visiting and your kind comment! :) be blessed x

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  11. I do really like #3! We need to laugh and who better to do it with than our hubbies?

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    1. Hi Leslie! what an honour having you around! thanks so much for visiting and your comment! I've just downloaded your new book and I'm looking forward to reading it! I'd love to post a review here on my blog and I'll defo send feedback to Amazon! all the best in this new project! May God continue blessing you and using you mightily! love, Angie

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  12. Everything is true, especially for those who built there marriages in God. Thanks for sharing, visiting from Matrimonial Monday, have a super blessed day!
    Love

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  13. Very well stated. I'd like to think that the reason that my husband and I have such a great marriage is because of all the things that you listed above - most of all communication. The only thing that I'd add to communication is the willingness to listen to the other person without taking immediate offense to what they said.

    Beautiful post.

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  14. Angie...wonderful hints. Laughing is one thing we do well in our marriage. My husband has great wit. Thank you for sharing at WJIM this week. I'm thankful you are faithful to each week. Blessings.

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    1. You are the reader's choice over at WJIM this week. I am glad to feature you. yay!

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  15. Angie, you have given great tips on revitalizing a marriage. Each of these are so very important to getting that flame back. When couples understand the three kinds of love and what they mean in a marriage I believe it helps them to get the flame burning bright once again. My husband, Tony, and I did a podcast, Flame Burning Bright, http://www.oneextraordinarymarriage.com/112-flames-burning-bright, on this to help couples understand each.

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